Military kid says, "You could see this blank look in his eyes."

My dad is back from his deployment but it just seems like he is not the same dad I remember. Before he laughed alot, he wanted to spend time with me and he didn't mind all the commotion in the house. Now he seems to just sleep all the time. I heard another kid say that her dad just plays video games by himself all the time now that he's back. I have another friend who said her mom got angry alot. When I try to talk to my dad he doesn't seem to listen. It seems like he is thinking of something else. I see this blank look in his eyes and it scares me. It feels like he is ignoring me but I can't tell. One odd thing is that he goes out with his buddies and has fun but he doesn't ever have fun at home with us. It feels like he doesn't want to spend time with us.

I am wondering if I did something wrong when he was away that he knows about? I know I didn't do so well in school. Maybe mom told him that I didn't help out at home and he doesn't want to talk to me. I am sort of afraid to talk to him because I don't want him to get upset. I really want to know what it was like where he was but that discussion is clearly off limits. I remember when my dad was normal but I don't know if he will be that way again. So I'm not sure what to do.

Tip:

  • This may be a time when it would be a good idea to talk with someone you trust so you can sort through some of your thoughts. It may be another military kid or just someone who won't say "Don't worry, everything will be fine." You might start the conversation with something like "My dad seems different since he came home and I don't know why?" Or "Does your mom sleep all the time when she comes home after being deployed?"